Having the right touch

Saturday, May 10, 2014 Permalink 0

So, I’ve been on a loving touch spree for the past week or actually over two weeks.  I didn’t read the fine print in my “How to Train a Wild Elephant” book.  Use loving hands and a loving touch, even with inanimate objects.  I inadvertently skipped over the P.S. so I decided to do this exercise over.

Last Saturday, Bob gave me a hard time about lovingly touching inanimate objects.  He tried to goad me into an in-home demonstration at his new palatial Portage Park digs.  I admit the idea sounds funny but it is was a good exercise for me to reflect on multiple levels.

Bob and Gator’s new home is a beautiful example of a loving touch of inanimate objects.  They have furnished and decorated with tender loving care. Everything is displayed in its ideal locale. The marriage of two families is present with photographs and remembrances of the past.  Gator has his family’s  frog rock lovingly perched in the yard.  Bob has lovingly planted heather in a tribute to his sister.  Their home is bursting with their combined loving touches.

My home also reflects a loving touch.  I’m a minimalist so everything I’ve chosen is a deliberate decision. I try not to horde stuff.  And when I decide to add something, it means something must go away.  This week, I purchased four new pieces of clothing so I had to choose what four items could be donated.  I have two shirts that have a weird orange bleach like stain at the armpit.  I’m worn them both this week.  They are two of my faves but they make me look like a hobo.  I decided to lovingly wash them and donate them.  I was going to toss them but decided they might be lovingly used by someone in need.  The decision reminded me of Joey and Phoebe in “Friends” ensuring unattractive trees had the opportunity to fulfill their Christmas destiny.

This week, I also entertained the book club.  I cooked dinner.  Those three words have more significance when I say them.  Even though I’m not an avid or good cook, I appreciate a homemade meal, especially when someone else prepares it.  I prefer eating out in a home than a restaurant.  Believing in reciprocity, I must pick up the occasional pan and saute it.  This week, I worked on lovingly preparing the meal.  I shopped with care.  I chopped with care.  I tried to focus on cooking as the loving  gesture to my friends.  I missed lovingly touching the asparagus sooner and it was overcooked.

Everyone and everything could use a loving touch.  I need to be mindful of that.  In my haste to live a robust life, I’m a yanker.  I have a tendency to grab something on the fly.  And when it reacts to my abruptness, I get annoyed.  I tried over the last several days to be gentle.  I took time to lovingly place things in their space instead of tossing or yanking them.  The gentle act did make me more aware and appreciative of the object.

FINAL WORDS:  “When you handle rice, water or anything else, have the affectionate and caring concern of a parent raising a child.”   -Zen master Dogen

This week I’m working on *waiting*.  It’s something I’m not good at. Patience has never been my virtue.

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