I had lunch with a colleague yesterday. In 2014, I’m committed to sitting down with each of our 23 staff for a purely social getting-to-know-you meal. This was the first one. Jen is the most senior person on staff. She started in 1999. I’ve been there since 2004. Although we’ve worked together for nearly ten years, our positions keep us pretty separate. She engaged me with interesting personal factoids. And as I got to know her better, she served as a mirror for me.
“In the last year, you are a lot nicer. I think the yoga is helping you. Maybe you’re more zen.”
Thank you?! It was one of those compliments/criticisms that either makes you defensive or reflective.
In my 20s, I might have turned over the table and stormed out.
In my 50s, I’m much more about knowing myself. And I do understand what she is saying.
I wouldn’t say I’m ever mean at the workplace. I arrive every day with a hearty ‘good morning‘ to anyone I pass en route to my office. Once in my office, I’m fairly no nonsense. I have a daily list to accomplish. And undoubtedly, various unknown emails will try to dictate my work day. I play hard so I work hard. I often only emerge from my office to use the bathroom or go to a meeting. I’m not an office wanderer. I don’t walk around looking to chit-chat. I’m there to work and I do.
Over the last year, yoga wonderfully breaks my rhythm on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons. I take a prolonged break and find my center. The practice itself, combined with hitting my 50 milestone, has made me ‘nicer.‘ This is my journey. A large part of my life has been spent at NRS… a decade x 40 hours a week – vacation time = nearly 20,000 hours. As I prepare to end my tenure at NRS over the next couple of years, I’m mindful of leaving the place better than I found it. That’s the Girl Scout way. And also taking the time to listen to people’s needs.
On “30 Rock,” Liz Lemon’s guy complains that all the emails he receives are sent ‘high priority.‘ They each have a red exclamation mark. He profoundly says, “everything can’t be a priority.” That is a perfect mantra for a manager of ten years. I have the experience to determine what and who requires a little extra attention. I’ve often described my position as an air traffic controller. I need to pace the work for smooth and on-time arrival with minimized turbulence.